This is really silly but I was floundered. For a good minute, my eyebrows furrowed, I muttered; he doesn't drink coffee anymore?!
See. My ex and I used to drink coffee in the morning together. It was a ritual, a sort of bonding routine, we were starting our day as one. I was never a big drinker until I started sharing my nights with him. Then, a good steaming cup of coffee came to signify a good start, the beginning to a good day. It was comforting. When we broke up, I continued our daily routine; a lover's truce.
So. My ex doesn't drink coffee anymore, I wonder what else has changed? I mean, I know that I've changed. The last 10 months have been eventful; I've felt, pondered, experienced things, people...
I used to dream of reconciliation; I hoped we could pick up where we left off, minus the pain, the struggling, the insecurity. I imagined that I could hold Babygirl's hands, as we strolled through streets, her father at my side. It's been time I drink my coffee elsewhere...
When I was a little girl, I loved "Beauty and the beast", "Cinderella", "Snow White".
From a young age, my "Happily ever after" consisted of finding a man to love and to cherish. In fact, most of my girlfriends have been fed this bullshit. We fell in this trap; we've been searching for prince charming, whilst laying down with a whole lot of toads...
David introduced me to "FABLES" a graphic novel about all your favorite fairy tales characters, whom have been forced out of their lands and have taken refuge in New York City.
It's a beautiful, fresh satyr; Snow White, after killing the seven dwarfs (they used to sexually abuse her), divorced Prince Charming (after finding him on top of her sister, Rose Red), Cinderella was abandoned by her prince, Bigby (the big bad wolf) reformed and is currently a detective, Rose Red is dating Jack (the bean boy). You'll be happy to learn that Beauty and The Beast are still married, they go through their ups and downs, in fact they argue like an old couple (centuries of marital life might do that to you) but they are still in love.
OH. David and I broke up, by the way. We realized that we both had some issues to work out. Also, we had different expectations and perception of commitment etc... It was mutual, in fact; It was the cleanest break up I've ever had.
I'm re-evaluating my "Happily ever after". I want to be in love again, it will come, but I refuse this to dictate my happiness.
I'm wondering; Am I the only one that feels like happiness and love are one and the same?